The past few weeks have been pretty mixed.  I lost another friend from my youth this last week.  We weren't good friends, but we once were friends.  His sister is one of the best friends I've had in life.  We were friends 30ish years ago, but as my fellow BRATs can attest to, time means nothing.  Once friends, you never forget. He too had his demons to deal with, unfortunately he lost the battle.  It made me sad that he had such pain in many ways in his life.  I mention this because it brought me back to my post last time.  I have my issues, but don't we all in one way or another.  I wish I could have done something to help him.  I have excellent memories from the past, and will always remember him that way.

On a much happier note, most excellent news this last week!!  My older daughter finally got the news we were praying for.  She, as well as my younger daughter who received the best news earlier, are both negative for the Breast Cancer gene BRCA2.  I have prayed since the day I found out that they would be spared, and they are.  Since it doesn't skip a generation it ends with me, just as I prayed.  I want to shout from the rooftop so everyone can hear.   You really have no idea how happy my family is.  Praise God for having their dad have the stronger genes.  While there is never any guarantee, they do not have to worry every day, nor do any medical prevention.  Woo hoo!!!!

Sorry(ish) for my Debbie Downer post last time.   I get frustrated sometimes and felt I needed to express some of the crap I try to prevent from dwelling on in this blog.  It is how I feel sometimes, and this time I just decided to put it out there.  I'm all good now.  Was actually good after putting it out.  It was cathartic and, It is what it is.  :)

Healthwise I'm doing good.  During my last Onc appointment, he decided to have me take a break from the chemo based on all the problems I was having.   He wanted my body to have time to heal from the Hand Foot Syndrom as well as the nausea, headaches, rash and fatigue.  I'm happy to report it worked.  It was a nice glimpse at what it will be like in 4 or 5 months from now.  Its been three weeks since I took the pills and my hands and feet are not burning anymore.  The recovery has been kind of gross.  They all look like I painted glue on and was peeling it off.  My feet are too gross to take a picture, let's just say they are NOT sandal ready.  I started the pills again a few days ago, but at a lower dose.  Hopefully that helps.  The rash on my scar line has not gotten any worse, actually a little better, so it is being dubbed radiation recall due to the Xeloda.

Burning stopped, peeling commenced

An almost normal hand. 

Sadly I have noticed I am losing hair again.  I noticed my eyebrows getting very thin, and my eyelashes.  Its sort of elsewhere legs etc., no head hair yet.  Unexpected but doable.  Chemo brain continues and seems to be somewhat worsening in that I forget simple words and have trouble finding words, concentration is the length of a gnat.  Hopefully that repairs in time.

I have finished my mentor training with ABCD and now look forward to helping others that are going through this "adventure".  There are some special things in the works for IBC specifically, so I'm excited to start that as well.

I hope everyone is enjoying the slowly warming weather and the longer daylight hours.  Funny when I was a kid I loved the night and dark.  Maybe because it was easier to cover my tracks so to speak.....lol.

Happy Spring everyone!!  Hope you all enjoy the coming Easter season.

......and as always check the boobs.  Its about time for a visual and physical check don't you think.  :)  👍