Well, I'm back (I'm back in the saddle again....👀)

Took a 4 month hiatus to enjoy life and we begin again.

Last I left you, we had been told my cancer had returned and we went to many different appointments for results to confirm and plan for those results.  Well results are starting to come in.

Monday I had my port put in.  Fentanyl again, I see how people get hooked to that.  You are still conscience, but just don't care about anything.  Although afterward, and a few days later, it really hurt; that doctor really worked to get my port in.  Good news, its smaller and less protruding than the last one.  It's a friend for life so the less it is bothersome, the better.

Also a little good news on Monday, my test results were posted for the brain scan and......the brain scan is clear :)

Tuesday bright and early the PET scan.  Radioactive dye entering my veins, I get to sit still for an hour and listen to music.  Got reaquainted with the good music I have and relaxed for awhile.  Then the PET scan.  Good thing I'm only slightly claustrophobic.  Half an hour later and I'm cut loose.  My doctor appointment having been canceled waiting on results, I have time to be normal again and get the days chores done since it is only 10:00 a.m.

Tuesday afternoon, the bad news.  The cancer is a return of my breast cancer.  It is more because of the triple negative than the Inflammatory.  They have also sent the tissue out to genomics (genetics) to be tested to see if they can pinpoint what is going wrong with my DNA, which little sucker is being a bastard.  If they find something specific, they can treat it very specific.  If not, we continue with our plan.

Good news again, the cancer is not in my organs.  It is in my peritoneum, and a couple of lymph nodes in my chest.  The plan is to contain it there and kill it.  Back to killing the beast.

All this was received through a phone call.  Sitting for two days waiting to get to the doctor was agony.  All the fears, all the unanswered questions, all the unverified research, all the thoughts slip in and out with no definite answers.  Agony.

Thursday morning comes and we get our answers.  We start chemo today with my new pick of poison Gemzar (short name), then an old friend that wipes me out for a few days Carboplatin.  Next Thursday its only Gemzar.  Then I'm off the following week.  Then it starts all over.  When does it

end?  It is the song that never ends, it goes on and on my friends.

To say I'm not sad, scared to terrified, frustrated, angry and stunned would be just a lie.  I really believed when they said I was cancer free that I was.  I believe now, that was not the case.  It just gave me a nice summer break to get out and do things with my husband, family and friends.  Not to say I still won't, it will just be back to a limited basis based on counts, and how I feel.  You all know I'm on Facebook, email, and text.  Don't be shy.   And certainly ask questions if you have them.

For now, I have lots of learning to do about how to eat REALLY healthy, stay away from sugar, alcohol, and any of those yummy bad and/or fried foods.  Broccoli, Asparagus, Lemons, Fruit, vegetables, and limited lean meats will be my new friends.  Yum 😏  I also have all those someday projects at home, its someday.

I am prepared to do whatever it takes to fight this fucker.  I will look at traditional medicine, alternative medicine, supplements, and second and third opinions (which is in the works, with the docs blessing and help). 

I still am planning to meet my grandchildren, and in order to do so I'm gonna have the fight of my life.  I am going to have some pretty down days, and I'm going to have some pretty up days.  Mostly I just want to continue to live as normal as possible with poison helping along the way.  I remain ever hopeful. 

I will continue to keep you posted as things come up, or I simply feel like writing.  I like to do this to help inform, as well as keep a journal so I can look back and remember what I've been through.  I also want it to  journal for someone else that may be looking for some answers.

Florida in Winter is on semi-hold for now, but you know if I can, I will.  My friends will miss me :)